Baby on the Way

After trying for a few months, my husband and I have been blessed with a developing baby. I'm now 22 weeks pregnant and overwhelmed with the prospect of becoming a first-time mom. In anticipation of the positive pregnancy test, I read up on a lot of baby and parenting books, blogs, and sites. I even started my baby registry (with the mindset that we would be having a boy first) on amazon. I was so excited to be moving on to this next chapter in my life that I over-saturated my brain with baby - that is, until I actually found out I was pregnant.

The first few months, it seemed too good to be true. I didn't want to tell anyone just in case we lost it, but my big mouth overruled me on that one. I stopped looking at baby stuff for fear that I would jinx it. I went to my doctor's appointments, saw the baby moving, and still couldn't quite believe that what I saw on the screen reflected what was going on in my womb. I'm the kind of person who has hopes and dreams for my life and never believes that I could actually obtain any of them. This was just another case of my unbelievable felicity.

After we found out the gender in our 20 week visit and I started feeling distinct movement, I finally allowed myself to revel in the new life created within me. I also began to freak out. I'm not ready to be a mom! I'm only 25. I still have no idea what I want to do with my life. How can we provide for children while still trying to reach our financial goal of being debt-free? I'm just now rethinking my career and flirting with the idea of going back to school to pursue Interior Design. Becoming a published author, it turns out, requires much more discipline and energy than I have. Figuring out how to juggle being a full-time mom and part-time employee is going to be hard.

So as my life is transitioning yet again, I am faced with new challenges, many of which come from rethinking the choices I've made up to now. I have come to understand that sometimes the best way to face them is head-on as they come. Creativity comes out of necessity, and I believe that this next chapter of my life is going to require a lot of creativity.

I know that with God's help and the support of my family and friends, I can overcome these challenges. And I know that I will grow tremendously because of them. So, (I guess) bring 'em on!