Since I have my wedding coming up in 3 months (and I couldn't be more excited), I've been spending my time preparing for married life, reading up on blogs and books, receiving pre-marital counseling from 2 pastors I respect, and praying--a lot. I still think it's funny that although I do put some importance in the wedding day, I basically see it as a means to an end. I'm more excited to spend the rest of my life with the love of my life.
As I've been reading various blogs giving tips on how to have a marriage that lasts or secrets to a successful marriage, I have a hard time taking most of them seriously. Now, I may change my tune in a few years, but as of now most of these blogs are unhelpful. One tells me to hold hands with my husband, another study shows that couples who post public displays of affection on facebook stay together longer. Each of these cite what I see as the product of love to be the cause. Couples who can't keep their hands to themselves (whether they're in their twenties or sixties) touch each other because they want to. They want to touch each other because they love each other. Couples posting on facebook are posting because they're happy, not in hopes to become happy.
In my opinion, couples who love each other (and express that love) stay together. These other things come naturally to those who express their love in those ways. Now, I'm a firm believer that love is a choice that we must make every day since the day we make a vow to love someone "'til death do us part." Some days that choice will be easy, some days it won't. When we make that choice to love our spouse, we are choosing also to continue to put them above ourselves. We are choosing to remind them of our love--whatever that looks like for them (Think: Five Love Languages). I thank God that He brought me someone who expresses his love the same way I do. For others, it's a learning curve. In time, though, it'll come easily.
Most importantly, couples who love God more than their partners and keep Him as the foundation for their marriage will benefit from a long-lasting marriage. God at the center really makes a difference, as He is love and gives us the ability to love.
